Small victories

Firstly, apologies for being a little quieter than I would have liked to be for World IBD Day. On Wednesday we got ‘the call’ from nursery – little man has spots, can you get them checked out. Turned out to be Chicken Pox II – The Return. So lots of stuff had to be moved and cancelled, and because the pox prevented him sleeping, we didn’t sleep either until last night. Hopefully he’ll be able to go back to nursery on Tuesday.

We have been very grateful for the help, support and advice of our GP surgery (urgent care nurse & GP), NHS 111 and out of hours GP and community pharmacist in trying to make him at least comfortable whilst this has been going on. When your child is having really high temperatures and symptoms which when Googled look terrible, it can be difficult to resist jumping in the car and heading for A&E – but I took my own advice from here and we managed it, and our anxieties without hours and hours of waiting.

Anyway, the new treatment that I was started on after my EUA seems to be working, and so yesterday for the first time in 4 years I was able to dispense with the little net pants I’ve used to hold my incontinence pads in place (see picture). I’m still wearing a small pad, but it’s of the type you can pick up in the supermarket rather than the full inco pad I had been wearing.

I have to admit it was a bit odd being less… restricted. However, for me it is a huge step forward to this wound being healed – less discharge so less need for a pad. And that is a step towards exercise and being able to be more active with my family and in life. The fact that I only have to have the wound checked twice a week, rather than dressed everyday has already made a huge difference to our lives – and so I am very much looking forward to it all being over!

So for now I just have to decide what to do with myc ollection of net pants. A ritual burning? Or perhaps I’ll put them on eBay – I understand there is a market for such things…

Mental Health Awareness Week – #MHAW17

The theme for this years Mental Health Awareness Week is ‘Surviving or Thriving?’.

I’ve done a really quick video talking about my experiences of low mood in the past – and whilst my IBD has been part of that, it hasn’t been the whole story…

So my advice would be, if you are feeling low, or that something isn’t right – talk to someone, and then get some support. The mental health aspects around IBD are not always at the forefront of our treatment plans, and surgery in particular can create or amplify issues – so don’t leave it unchecked and untreated.

Look mum I’m on the tele!

Today at work I had to drive to a meeting, and as I was driving my phone started going a bit crazy in my pocket. When I arrived it became apparent I had been featured (well my picture) on ITV daytime show Loose Women who this week launched a campaign about body image using the hashtag #MyBodyMyStory – fellow IBD & Ostomy blogger Shell Lawes (who is hosting #IBDHour this month) spotted this and encouraged those of us in the IBD and ostomy comunity to get invovled, so I sent a tweet last night and then forgot all about it.

So three minutes into todays show, this image graced the nations screens!

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This particular picture is about two years old, and I’ve put on a bit of weight since then, but you can just about see my scar and obviously see my bag.

There are people with IBD and ostomies who would not be comfortable doing this, and there will be people who ‘don’t want to see it’, so by taking part hopefully it normalises ostomy bags – the show has apparently shown at least one ostomy image each day this week. And well done to the Loose Women for allowing so many people to share there bodies and there stories.

You can watch todays show for the next week on the ITV Hub.

Shell has been capturing the images of those people in the IBD & ostomy community and sharing them on her Instagram.

 

Post EUA Update

So a few days have passed since my Exam Under Anaesthetic (EUA) on Wednesday. The procedure went well and I was discharged as planned on the same day. No collection was found and there was no evidence of anything being left behind which has stopped it healing.

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This is of course good and bad news – no evidence of infection or collection is good, but it does mean we don’t have a reason for the slow healing! In between the plastic surgeon appointment and the EUA I did have a weekend where the wound bleed quite a bitnmore than it had been – it may be that if there was something physical there it has now passed.

So whilst I did not come away with any answers, I did come away with a new treatment plan. I have been prescribed a medication called Ortem – a topical metronizadole ointment. As I discovered when I tried to get it fromt he pharmacy (mor eon that in a moment) it is not yet fully licenced in the UK – however there has been some very encouraging research into this kind of wound being treated with it.

Now the hospital pharmacy didn’t have it, but I was told it should be available from my usual pharmacy. I got home mid-afternoon, and was going to have a little sleep, but decided to just call them and check if they had it – I thought perhaps they might need to order it in However, it didn’t appear on the computer…

Now at this point, in need of sleep, a bit spaced out I faced a dilema. Having been told by the hospital they didn’t have it, but community phramcy should, and then by community pharmacy that they don’t have it but hospital might it would be very easy to get pulled into an endless loop of calling consultants secretaries and hoping for call backs, so I put my best patient advocate hat on and got on Google…

Within 5 minutes I was speaking to Natalie at the manufacturer, who had advised me that the drug was unlicenced but available as a special order, and that my regular phramacy already have an account! She just needed to email them an order form…

So I went down to the pharmacy to try and get things moving – Lloyds have there own process so had to call head office who were not immediatly able to spring into action… The final result of this is that the drug is now en route via courier, but because of the bank holiday I won’t get it until Tuesday – so we are getting there slowly…

Since Wednesday I have been really tired – napping each day for several hours despite good nights of sleep too – although I didn’t sleep well on Wednesday night. The left side of my face under my glasses has also swollen into what could be the BIGGEST SPOT EVER – but hopefully I can treat that before it happens.

So, it’s lots of sleep, some more patience and then maybe this wonder ointment can do it’s thing…

Wound Update

I realise that it has been a little whilse since I did an update about me and my wound, so here goes…

So, the wound where I had my anus and rectum (and internal pouch) removed (proctectomy) has still not healed – now nearly 15 months after the operation. This operation is known in IBD/ ostomy circles as ‘The Barbie Butt’. The cavity is still about 4 cms deep, and I’ve been having near daily dressings since May 2016.

Wound End March 2017

You can also see a little hole (top right) where there was previously a fistula. – this picture is from the end of March.

I saw my surgeon just before new year, he referred me to a plastic surgeon to consider closing the wound. The plastic surgeon said no – because unless we know why it hasn’t healed then it is likely to just breakdown again. His opinion was something has been left behind – could be a bit of pouch, a hair, a stitch – so the plan is for me to have an examination under anaesthetic (EUA) in a few weeks time conducted by the two colorectal consultants who did the excision. Hopefully threy will be able to work out what is going on and fix it, and then it will just have to heal, rather than need further surgery – but there really is no way of knowing right now.

I would be lying if I said I am OK with this. I am not in pain, able to work and do most things – although I have not really done exercise until very recently when a plan was put together. However the almost daily dressing changes have meant leaving work early and catching up and needing to be close to home at weekends (trips away are OK, but day trips are difficult) and of course that doesn’t just impact on me. I have had moments, particularly after Christmas and coming up to the one year anniversery of the surgery where I have been low and teary about it all. I am fortunate to have a very supportive family and friends.

So now I am trying to look forwards – hoping that after this procedure all will heal up and we can get back to normality. The nurses often comment how upbeat and positive I seem to be – I work at heard at keeping that way so I don’t get swept into a downward spiral. So when they knock me out in a week or so, lets hope that is the beginning of the end.

 

An open letter to my friends & family

 Hi everyone,

So as you know I had big surgery in January 2016. The wound hasn’t healed, and next week I’m going to see a plastic surgeon about it.

I’ve had over 200 dressings applied, which started in May. Most of the time that has been 7 days a week. It has been very disruptive to my life, to our lives as a family. Catching up with missed work. Being tired from growing a new buttock. 2 further hospital admissions.

And that has meant plans have been cancelled. Sometimes rearranged. Or not made at all. And as it has gone on longer and longer, fewer and fewer plans got made. 

And I’ve tried to be upbeat – no, it doesn’t hurt, yes it’s still going on, ha ha, growing a new bum cheek – but it’s getting harder. Hopefully next week will give me a time frame for getting it sorted.

And so this is an apology for plans cancelled or not made at all, birthday cards that came late, phone calls not made.

And I’m not ready to promise, but there is a hope that it will all be over soon. Then plans can be made, games played, meats BBQd and drinks drunk.

So, please bear with me, it has been a bit limbo-Esque, and there is much I want to do once I no longer have a hole in my bottom.

 

 

 

What to write?

Sometimes I really struggle with what to write about in my blog. As the main focus is about my inflammatory bowel disease and subsequent surgeries, sometimes there are periods when not much is happening, which don’t make for great reading.

Right now for instance, I am still having the wound from my surgery 12 months ago packed daily. I am waiting to see a plastic surgeon to see if anything can be done about that wound. And there is an infection in it so I am taking antibitoics. Other than that, health wise I am OK (I have a bit of a cold but it’s not too bad – I had my flu jab).

My blog has always ben about my journey, so when nothing is happening, it makes the updates harder to do. As such, I don’t have a huge following, and most of my readers are friends who read it via facebook. Of course, if I don’t post regular updates, then I won’t get more readers… so it is a problem.

The other issue is that I am pretty busy. I work full time, and by the time I have come home and got either dinner ready or the toddler to bed, I’m not at my most creative. I have a few ideas, but never seem to have the energy to develop them. It’s hard to know if this lack of energy is IBD related – fatigue is a huge issue – or if it is my body trying to grow a new buttock, or if it is just life in general.

However, it is helpful to me. So I shall continue to try. I’d like to get into video posts (vlogs) but need to get myself an iPhone adaptor for my tripod. And maybe some lights…

What I have discovered recently is there are some great IBD blogs out there, from a range of people at a range of stages in there journey. I’ll put a list together. Maybe reading more of them will help me find my voice…