How do I feel?

Once again it has been too long, so thanks for bearing with me. In case you missed it we had our second child in July, and after two weeks of paternity leave it was back to work. My wife is breast feeding, so I’m still mostly able to sleep, although the broken sleep is probably more tiring than a lack of sleep.

Eldest started school in September and has been pretty whacked, so early to bed but still early to rise. So over the last 3 months both my wife and I have got more and more tired. Then you might get a night when the baby is unsettled, and the toddler wakes up a few times too.

I’ve been trying to eat healthily, but can’t survive without energy drinks – although I am now on sugar free ones.

That of course is par for the course for any new parent unless they are blessed with a child who sleeps through. However, with IBD and a Stoma fatigue can be an ongoing issue, as well as dehydration which also leads to tiredness. And that can take many forms.

There is physical, not wanting to get up in the morning tiredness. Or can only manage to sit on the sofa and watch TV or read a book I’ve read before tiredness. The no energy to exercise tiredness – even though I know if might help.

Brain fog, and a lack of being able to prioritise tasks – book a haircut. And as for creative things like blogging and poetry – forget it.

So what’s the solution? I could get up, go to work, come home, and then go to bed shortly after the toddler – but I don’t think my marriage would last long if I didn’t do some of the baby childcare too. Work is non- negotiable, though I have cut down on my evening and weekend work. I could stop the energy drinks, as I know there is a drop off – but not sure I can get by without them yet, or try and do some exercise.

I think it is all probably just parenting fatigue, but it is very draining. My wound has stayed healed, and the occasional discharge I had is less frequent. I don’t have any other IBD symptoms.

I’ve probably not been the best friend recently, so apologies to those I’ve not caught up with. Sometimes I struggle to recognise when I’m just tired and what might be low mood creeping back in.

I’m currently being used as a bed by a baby who won’t sleep in his bed. I shall try him again in a while, as he is now snoring away.

Tomorrow I have a day off and so will be doing some half term activities with a 4 year old, and hopefully some as a family.

So how do I feel? Exhausted.

For anyone else who has been there, how do you tell the difference between IBD fatigue and just being tired?

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